Although infertility affects both men and women, men don’t always have the opportunity, or the inclination, to talk about their experiences.
Women, often the focus of fertility treatments, seem to receive more support from friends and family and have resources, such as support groups, that men may not have access to. But this does not mean that men need to or should get through this period alone.
A recent study reported by the nonprofit organization Healthy Women said that male partners of couples with infertility were likely to feel depressed and to have erectile dysfunction and other sexual relationship problems.
As a man, it is important that you have a space to grieve and cope with your experience with infertility. Coping mechanisms such as focusing on fixing the problem or keeping your feelings to yourself have the potential to distance you from your partner, harming your relationship.
Here are a few tips that are specifically for you:
Discuss your feelings with your partner
Do you feel left out or excluded from the infertility process? Do you feel sad or angry? If you have been focusing on helping your partner and have not taken the time to process your own feelings, try sharing some of your emotions with her. Sharing your feelings, even if both of you are sad in different ways, can help you create a closer bond while helping each other cope.
Group support
We offer group support for couples here in Philadelphia. Sharing your experience with other couples, and other guys, who understand where you are coming from, can be a great source of strength and healing as you continue fertility treatments.
Fertility-free dates
Take some time off from your journey to become parent to just enjoy your relationship. Having a date where you don’t discuss fertility or try to conceive can bring back the joy of intimacy to your relationship. Similarly, sex-free dates can help you connect on a deeper level and bring more fun and spontaneity to your relationship.
Take some time for yourself
Spending long periods of time as a caretaker, even when you are helping the one you love most, can take its toll. Make sure you have something in your life, such as a hobby, date night, or time with friends, that brings you joy.
Are you looking for more personal support? We can help. Call us to find out how we help couples, women, and men cope with infertility, or just fill out the contact form and click Send.
Stay tuned for our next installment where we will discuss tips to keep your relationship strong while coping with infertility.
